Crazy woman: I’m still alive and breathing, thank you very much, despite the best efforts of the Devil.
–Food Court, Grand Central
Overheard by: Rich Mintz
Crazy woman: I’m still alive and breathing, thank you very much, despite the best efforts of the Devil.
–Food Court, Grand Central
Overheard by: Rich Mintz
Guy: So you don’t think neck tattoos are sexy?
Girl: No.
Guy: What do they make you think of?
Girl: Prison.
Guy: What if I get my name in Hebrew?
Girl: Jewish prison.
–10th & Ave B
Overheard by: Trying not to laugh
Check in girl: I only like buying books with sparkles on the cover.
–York & 72nd
Overheard by: fance
Teenage girl on cell: I gotta find this book in the religion section. You know, it's like… it's not that you believe in god, or you don't believe in god, but that you just don't care? I want that book!
–Borders Bookstore, Midtown
Amtrak conductor: A free copy of Amtrak's Arrive magazine is located in your seat pocket. For those seeking enlightenment, this magazine is the first step.
–Train, Penn Station
Student, discussing The Sound and the Fury: I suppose it's a very *artsy* ending–a big, retarded guy holding a broken flower… Does that come with skinny jeans and an apartment in Williamsburg?
–Stuyvesant High School
Tipsy 30-something nerd: We can't all be riding escalators with hard-ons.(older woman turns around) What, lady? It's a literary reference, look it up!
–1st & 7th
Overheard by: Phyllis Dean
God Squad man: God loves each and everyone of you! The Bible says–
Woman #1: The Bible says it’s 8AM.
Woman #2: Yeah, sit down and shut up.
–L train
Promoter guy: Do you girls like comedy?
Girl #1: No.
Promoter guy: You telling me you girls don’t like to
laugh?
Girl #2: Laughing is against our religion.
Promoter guy: And what religion would that be?
Girl #1: Mormon.
–Broadway between Bleecker & Houston
Jewish guy at bar: Yeah, I'd say that I am pretty religious.
Guy with him: Oh, so do you keep kosher?
Jewish guy at bar: Oh, no, that's sooo expensive.
–Toad Hall, SoHo
Overheard by: Christian Johnson
Woman on cell: This is the same girl who has G-strings where her forks and knives should go.
–2nd St & Ave B
Salesgirl: Do you want your boobies up or down?
–Victoria’s Secret, Manhattan Mall
Overheard by: Linda
Woman: I told Terrence not to pack that stuff in my carry-on. Security threw out all my Victoria Secrets!
–Starbucks, La Guardia airport
Overheard by: Allears
Girl: Only fat girls and porn stars wear Ds. I want to be a C!
–Victoria’s Secret, 57th St
Man: Do you want to get some maternity underwear to make you feel sexy?
–Greene St & Prince St
Overheard by: deadzebra
Man: Are you a Jehovah’s Witness? ‘Cause I don’t want you comin’ to my house unless you’re going to drop your panties!
–PATH train
Overheard by: blkgirl
Girl on cell: Dad? Hi. I just bought a lot of panties at Victoria’s Secret. Can you reimburse me? Dad?
–Broadway & Prince St
Overheard by: djingo
Subway preacher, after incoherent rant: So, can I get a ‘Hallelujah’? [Passengers silent.] Well, then can I get a ‘Thank you, Jesus!’? [Passengers silent.] Okay, then. Now I’m just going to talk to the born-again Christians on this train. Everybody else can ignore me — just like you’re ignoring Jesus!
–4 train
Overheard by: JVM
British white guy with dreads: Where are we?
Girl: 34th Street.
British white guy with dreads: 34th Street? Isn't that where that miracle happened?
–34th St
Overheard by: GV
Gay guy: You know, this one culture worships this cut-out in the grass of this man with a giant penis.
Girl: I'd worship that.
–6th & Waverly
Overheard by: I worship it, too
