Guy, walking toward Broadway: You're the one that I want.
Girl, walking toward 7th Ave: You're the one that I want.
Both, as they continue to walk away: Oo oo oo, honey!
–Times Square
Overheard by: MissPinkKate
Guy, walking toward Broadway: You're the one that I want.
Girl, walking toward 7th Ave: You're the one that I want.
Both, as they continue to walk away: Oo oo oo, honey!
–Times Square
Overheard by: MissPinkKate
Girl on cell: I don't need anything else. I've got 20 dollars, my phone, and a condom.
–11th & 3rd Ave
Overheard by: Alex
Flamboyant boy on cell: Wait, where are you? What are you doing? Please tell me you'll wear a condom. (pause, then boy's face grows increasingly horrified) Several condoms.
–Dining Hall, NYU
Street vendor next to hot dog vendor: Get your Obama condoms! They go great with a pretzel!
–Times Square
Overheard by: not another tourist
15-year-old girl: Damn, nigga, I hope you flushed the condom, cuz they be using turkey basters for other shit now. They be taking the condom from the trash can and suck up the cum and put it in theyselves. I know, cuz I messed with a few niggaz who be telling me and I learn in sex ed!
–74 Bus, Staten Island
Irritated tourist mother to baffled seven-year-old daughter: Your father is such a fuckin' dickwad! And let me tell you–he wasn't even inspired the night we made you.
–Times Square
Overheard by: tinyfoo
Guy on cell: I haven't talked to my dad in over three years, and this morning he friended me on Facebook.
–1st Ave & 89th Street
Overheard by: Citats
Guy on cell: Well, I wouldn't say I have the best relationship with my father, no. Umm… Well, for example, if he answers the phone when I call the house he says "Oh. Hey, failure."
–Union Square
Overheard by: Olivia
Woman on cell to friend: Uh-huh girl, I brought William to his donors' house and he didn't want to watch him. I said "William, William, say goodbye to your donor because he don't wanna watch you today."
–Bay Ridge, Brooklyn
Upper East Side girl at brunch with girlfriends: I need to find a new apartment because when I do the walk of shame I keep running into my dad.
–80th St & 2nd Ave
Woman to cashier: Do you have a bathroom I could use?
Cashier: No, we don't have public bathrooms here.
Woman: It is harder to pee in New York than to see a gorilla doing the Watusi in Times Square at high noon.
–Times Square
Black man in Batman suit trying to get tourists to pay to take pictures with him: I got bills! I got bills!
–Times Square
Overheard by: kpan
Traffic cop, motioning in vain for car to stop: I guess my powers aren't working today…
–Citifield, 7 Train Entrance
Teenage girl: I love my physics teacher. He's like a fat, middle-aged Superman.
–Bard High School, Queens
Overheard by: Sunny
Large man with heavy accent shouting into cell: Please send somebody–I have just been robbed. (pause) I am on the corner. (pause) What do you mean, "white"? He is a Spiderman! He's wearing a Spiderman suit!
–Stanton & Essex
Student #1: Hey, where N'Sync at?
Student #2: It's not “where N'Sync at,” it's “where are N'Sync at”?
–Times Square
Man handing out flyers: Hey, do you like comedy? Do you?
Passerby: No, thank you.
Man handing out flyers: So you're German?
–Times Square
Overheard by: Chloe E.
Black lady to family in obama t-shirts: You know how all those irish people have pictures of kennedy hanging up in their living rooms? Now we can do that too!
–Whole Foods, Columbus Circle
Overheard by: Definitely has a JFK picture in her apartment
Guy selling obama-themed condoms: Remember the election with every erection!
–Times Square
Overheard by: Mary Button
Black woman with a child in her stroller braiding her hair: There's gona be a lot of braidin in the white house.
–1 Train
Overheard by: Subway surfer
Woman on cell phone: Girl, if I can get to the front of the line at the vma's I can get to the front of the line at the damn inauguration. Shiiiit it's barack obama, girl!
–manhattan dental waiting room
Overheard by: Catherine
Stoned kid to a group of his friends discussing politics: You know what's scary bro? If obama gets assassinated, george bush is gonna be president again.
–1 Train @ 2AM going Downtown
Black man handing out metro: "get your obama metro! Get your obama metro! See, anyone can be president… I'm next!"
–59th Street, Lexington Ave
Overheard by: Yes we can!
Fashion photographer: That's a skirt? I thought it was a hat.
–Fashion Closet, Conde Nast Building
Indecisive woman to friend: I like this sweater in principle.
–Banana Republic, 86th & Broadway
Tween girl to mom: I'm not going to put my precious glove in the frickin' oven!
–Queens
Guy: I'm just saying, he doesn't dress like a bro.
–Astor Place
Irate girl wearing too much lipstick: That band really doesn't do him justice… I mean, I don't think he should have to wear a unitard. And she really shouldn't wear one, you know?
–6 Train
Overheard by: Wants to see him in unitard
Drunk guy on St. Patrick's Day to group of students by McDonald's: You guys want a fucking cheeseburger that fucking bad, huh?
Young teenager, sarcastically: Actually, I'm a vegetarian.
Drunk guy: Then what the fuck is this for?
Young teenager: Tofu and salad.
Drunk guy: Fuck this!
–Times Square
