Four-year-old girl, riding waspy dad’s shoulders: Daddy, are housing prices going to go down any time soon?
Dad: I sure as hell hope so.
–187th & Broadway
Overheard by: trump-i-poo
Four-year-old girl, riding waspy dad’s shoulders: Daddy, are housing prices going to go down any time soon?
Dad: I sure as hell hope so.
–187th & Broadway
Overheard by: trump-i-poo
Michelle: Hey, I wanted to go first, what the hell! You always cut me!
Asian friend, playfully sarcastic: Haha, hey, relax there, tiger. Ohhh yeah, everything is all about Michelle! Did you hear that sir, it’s all about Michelle? Don’t mess with her!
Michelle: Haha, shut up!
[Thirty seconds later.]Bus driver, on intercom: Just so everyone is aware, it’s all about Michelle. Don’t mess with that one.
–Port Authority Bus Terminal
Chick: No, seriously, man, I think your cat has rabies…
Guy, offended: And I thought you had rabies when I come home and find you hiding in my curtain yesterday, but I didn’t say anything then, did I?
–Greenwich Village
Girl #1: She asked us once if Jesus had a last name.
Girl #2: Oh. [Pauses.] Wait, I know this one.
–Penn Station
Little girl, pointing at Andy Warhol portrait of Marilyn Monroe: Mommy, who’s that lady?
Mom: That’s Elizabeth Taylor, honey.
Little girl: Oh, hello, Elizabeth.
–The Moderne Hotel, 55th & Broadway
Four-year-old cute tourist girl: Mommy, people are different in New York!
Tourist mom: They’re all fuckin’ crazy.
–Union Square
Overheard by: Natasha G
Hipster guy trying to make out with hipster girl: Come on baby, I swear I’m not drunk.
Exasperated hipster girl: Oh my god, I didn’t say you’re drunk, I said you have mono.
–Friday Night Bar Crawl, West 4th St
Girl #1: He really said that, “making gravy”?
Girl #2: Yeah! About a bodily function!
–Union Square
Stressed guy: But what are you going to do with no hair?!
Stressed girl: I don’t know… Have a baby?
–L Train
Overheard by: Karen
High-school teen to friend: So, like, every guy that likes me must totally be a pedophile.
–Flatbush & Dekalb, Brooklyn
13-year-old: I mean, he’s not a pedophile, he’s just very open with his sexuality, and I like that.
–8th & Broadway
Overheard by: Kelly
Lesbian on cell: I just saw these girls and they were pretty. Really pretty. And fifteen. But then I heard them talking and I realized they were French! So it’s fine. Fifteen is legal there.
–36th St & Fifth Ave
Middle-aged teacher: I have this girl in my class that’s a six-year-old with a 46-year-old woman’s body.
–Prem-On Thai
Overheard by: office peon
Guy who just got more beer: This is the happiest place on earth… Except for that kindergarten I’m not allowed to go back to anymore.
–McSorley’s, 7th & 3rd
Overheard by: I’ll drink to that!
Seven-year-old boy running after another child: I’m a pedophile! I’m a pedophile! I’m a pedophile!
–Coney Island Boardwalk
Overheard by: that’swhathesaid
