Girls

White girl, yelling to black friend: Heather! Come to the back of the bus and sit with me!
Heather: I ain't no Rosa Parks!

–Bus, Brooklyn

Girl #1: I got sick today from a eating plum a Hare Krishna gave me. They like…put something on it!
Girl #2: What's a Hare Krishna?
Girl #3: Oh my god, they are like this cult that John Lennon invented.

–NYU Dining Hall

Overheard by: Isabel

Girl on cell: So, you know, I was just lying there, like with my face to the wall and stuff and he just whips out his dick and starts hitting me in the back of the head with it.

–Washington Square Park

Overheard by: Zac Stone

Guy: I want to give you a Dirty Sanchez.
Girl: That better be the name of a drink!
Guy: Oh, it is…

–Canal & Broadway

Overheard by: Mellow_G

Tourist choir dude: You'll have to smoke.
Tourist choir chick: No, I won't.
Tourist choir dude: Yes, you have to smoke if you live here.

–Broadway & Wall St

Overheard by: Duncan Pflaster

Chick #1: So, do you have any plans for Saturday?
Chick #2: Yeah, I think I’m gonna go get my vag waxed.

–21st St & 3rd Ave

65-year-old lady, in bikini top and Daisy Duke shorts, with belly hanging over: Of course I am bisexual…can't you see the view?"

–49th St & 7th Ave

Overheard by: NATE MATHIS

Girl to guy: You can't be bisexual and married, John. That's, like, illegal!

–50th b/w 8th & 9th

Australian chic at bar: It's weird though, he reminds me so much of my ex-girlfriend.

–Mexican Restaruant, Lower East Side

Loud girl on cell: No, I did him, it was so good. (pause) Yeah, I fucked her too, she loved it.

–Hillside & Edgerton

Drunk lesbian: Why can't you be a girl or at least have a really big dick?

–Bowery Ballroom

Chick: Oh, so that TA made this problem set?
Dude: Yeah, he made that genomics, bitchy set, too.
Chick, pointing to Asian TA in back: That’s him!
Dude: Dude, no! He’s white.
Chick: Oh! I’ve been hating on the wrong TA this whole time!

–Columbia University

Girl #1: Are you sure he’s gay?
Girl #2: Um, yeah!
Girl #1: Nooo, he can’t be! How do you know?
Boy: Because he likes dick in his ass.
In unison: Oooh…

–Park Slope, Brooklyn

Hipster chick: He thought that by “phone sex” I meant “phone hanging out chat time”.
Friend: Bo-ring.
Hipster chick: I basically phone raped him.

–L Train