Wednesday One-Liners, with Tongue.

College girl to friend, disappointed: You know? I only made out with one of them…

–NYU Dorm

(hobo shakes can with change and interrupts couple in heated makeout session)
Bitchy girlfriend, shrieking: Seriously? Seriously? Are you seriously asking me now? We're in the middle of making out. Seriously?

–Ave B & 7th St

Overheard by: friend of the mole people

Guido to another: When you're makin' out, the next thing you know, you could be bangin'.

–Staten Island

Girl to guy friend: Once you get married, we are never going to be able to make out anymore.

–Houston & Mulberry

Man to friend: It's like that time I saw two women on walkers making out. I love New York!

–45th & 10th

Overheard by: Drunk

Posted on September 9, 2009
All Wednesday One-Liners, Alphabet City, Couples, Friends, Gays and Lesbians, Girls, Guidos, Hobos, Infidelity, K-I-S-S-I-N-G, Lower East Side, Marriage, Men, Midtown & Hell's Kitchen, NYU, One-liners, Only in New York, Promiscuity, Questions, Sorority Girls, Staten Island, Street, Wednesday One-Liners, Weirdness

Dear Diary, Met the Nicest Girl Today

Black guy to black girl: Are you a lesbian?
Black girl: Ha ha! No.
Black guy: What, you don't like pussy?
Black girl: No.
Black guy: I like pussy, why don't you show me yours?
Latina girl: Sit down.
(black guy sits down, Latina girl puts hands in his pants)

–Uptown 2 Train

Posted on September 7, 2009
Black People, Gays and Lesbians, Girls, Guys, Latinos, On the Subway, Pick-up Lines, Questions, Vagina

We Were With Him Until “Came Out Of the Ice.” How About You?

Crazy man: I would like to see that Hermes (pronounces it Her-MEES) scarf.
Man selling scarves and necklaces: It's pronounced air-mess. If you can't pronounce it, you probably can't afford it.
Crazy man: But in Greek it's pronounced Her-MEES.
Man selling scarves and necklaces: That has nothing to do with this scarf. The French can call it whatever they want.
Crazy man, to himself as he walks away: The French? The french with their Louis XIV wanting to be called the Sun King? What do the French know? They just came out of the ice! They don't know anything about anything!
Man selling scarves and necklaces, to himself: If you can't prononuce it, you can't afford it. That's funny.

–17th & 6th

Overheard by: Siena

Posted on September 6, 2009
Chelsea & the Meatpacking District, Crazies, Fashion, Foreigners, History & Geography, Languages, Men, Names, Questions, Shopping, Stupidity, Vendors & Street Performers

Destiny's Child: Really Makes You Think

Salesgirl: And this is the Carol's Daughter line of hair and body products. The creator named it after her mother, Carol.
Sarcastic customer: Really? Wow, I'd never imagine that.
Salesgirl, not getting sarcasm: Yeah, isn't that really cool?

–Sephora, W 34th St

Overheard by: nisey79

Posted on September 5, 2009
Chelsea & the Meatpacking District, Clerks, Customers, Hair, Health and Hygiene, Names, Parents, Questions, Shopping, Store, Stupidity

I've Decided to Add a Whole Additional Set Of Dietary Requirements

Girl #1: Wait, I thought you didn't eat meat?
Girl #2: I'm a pescetarian.
Girl #1: Oh. Aren't you Jewish?

–Sushi Samba, Park Ave

Posted on September 5, 2009
Food, Girls, Judaism, Midtown & Hell's Kitchen, Questions, Restaurants & Cafes, Stupidity, Vegetarian & Vegan, Words

Some Guardian Angels Are More Helpful Than Others

Guy to stranger, about girl who just left: Yo, that your girl?
Stranger: Nah, she a friend.
(silence)
Guy: She look like her mother?
Stranger: Does she?
Guy: I don't know, I'm asking you.

–McDonald's, Brooklyn

Overheard by: Julio C

Posted on September 5, 2009
Brooklyn, Friendship, Guys, Parents, Physical appearance, Questions, Restaurants & Cafes, Strangers

Time to Puke Into the Wind

Drunk hooligan: So are you ladies from Staten Island?
Group of college ladies: Um, sorry dude, we're not that drunk, please go away.
Drunk hooligan, walking away: I've never been shut down buy so many 6's in my life.

–Staten Island Ferry

Posted on September 4, 2009
Drinking & Drunk People, Drunks, Pick-up Lines, Questions, Sorority Girls, Staten Island Ferry

She's Beautiful, but I'm Thin

Woman: So, my boyfriend has been listening to the Dreamgirls soundtrack all week. He loves that Jennifer Hudson song.
Guy friend: He's gay?
Woman: He is not gay.
Guy friend: Yeah, maybe he just thinks Jennifer Hudson is hot.
Woman: Oh god. He is gay!

–23rd & 6th

Posted on September 3, 2009
About Celebrities, Chelsea & the Meatpacking District, Film, Friends, Gays and Lesbians, Guys, Music, Physical appearance, Questions, Women

…And You Refused to Ask That Guy for Directions.

Asian girlfriend: Do you know where you're going? Are you gonna get me lost again?
Ghetto Asian boyfriend: I know what I'm doing.
Asian girlfriend: That's what you said when we were in bed.

–St. Mark's Place

Overheard by: Adriana

Posted on September 3, 2009
Asians, Couples, Questions, Sex, Union Square and East Village, Weirdness

This Cannot End Well

10-year old boy: Hey Melissa, I'm wearing a cup.
7-year old girl: Really? Where? Can I feel?
10-year old boy: Over my who-who, yeah you can.
7-year old girl, grabbing cup: Oh, I like that… but why is it so hard?

–Kingsbay Football Field, Brooklyn

Posted on September 3, 2009
Brooklyn, Erections, Kids, Penis, Questions, Weirdness

Questions