Girl on cell: Hey, where are you?
Chorus of old Hispanic men, in unison: I'm right here, baby!
–Lorimer Street, Williamsburg
Overheard by: Holly
Girl on cell: Hey, where are you?
Chorus of old Hispanic men, in unison: I'm right here, baby!
–Lorimer Street, Williamsburg
Overheard by: Holly
Daughter: But mom, I don’t like the chicken.
Mother: Sorry, honey, not everything can be McDonald’s.
Headline by: Snowy in Seattle
Runners-Up:
· “Hates the chicken, but loves the cock” – Humberto
· “Hookers on “Take Your Daughter to Work Day”” – Krisztina
· “Just give George Bush one more term…” – Noh
· “M.A.F.D.- Mothers Against Fat Daughters” – L Friz
· “McDonlads is the only thing that doesn’t taste like chicken” – Babakganoosh
· “So shut up and eat the rest of your Meow Mix” – remark
Spanish chick #1: Some people are so stupid.
Spanish chick #2: You know what I’m saying?
Spanish chick #3: I’m studying psychology with a friend of mine and he said that this kid he knows got caught stealing but–get this, right?–the kid said he is not a thief he is just a kleptomaniac.
–Clothing store, 106th & 3rd
Overheard by: pimsluer
Skeevy vendor to girl purchasing sunglasses: Here, I polish for you.
Girl: Oh, thank you.
Skeevy vendor: You pretty girl. I polish for you. For ugly girls -never.
–St Mark’s Place
Overheard by: Mariah
Black chick #1: So you didn’t get the job?
Black chick #2: Nah, I fucked up. I shouldn’t have told them I drank when I was younger. I really didn’t drink.
–26th & 7th
Overheard by: max
Girl in line: And that’s when I told him that if he’s going to keep masturbating in a glass box, at least I shouldn’t have to… (stops, realizing everyone is listening)
Guy in line to friend: That is so going in my blog.
–Kimmel Center, NYU
Chick #1: Going shopping Saturday, get some more gold,
Chick #2: That’s you. You getting more gold, you gettin more ice. When you was MC Broke Behind, you wasn’t talkin ’bout gettin’ shit.
–42nd St. between 8th & 9th
Overheard by: Ben Colombo
Chick on cell: It's all about the eyeball lick. Tell her.
–59th St & 9th Ave
Overheard by: aenigma
NYPD cop: I would rather lick the street than ever smell your fart again.
–Forsyth St & E Houston St
Overheard by: Dave-o
Teen girl to friends: He's so gross! Seriously, I'd rather lick my cat's asshole than hook up with that guy!
–Barnes & Noble, Bayside
Guy at bar to friend: I can't believe you married a woman who won't lick your asshole.
–Ale House, MacDougal St
Random woman: Why do you always insist on licking my elbow?
–86th & 3rd
Overheard by: Jana
Girl: Oh my God, that’s what a smoker’s lung looks like?
Guy #1: Whoa… Yeah, I guess it is. Look, that’s what a cancerous lung looks like.
Girl: That is disgusting.
Guy #1: Really is.
Guy #2: Putrid. Absolutely grotesque.
Guy #1: Really makes you think twice about smoking. I really need a cigarette.
–Bodies Exhibition, South Street Seaport
Comedy show ticket seller: Hey! You dropped your scarf!
(girl with scarf around her neck rolls eyes)
Comedy show ticket seller: Hey, you must live here!
Girl: Yeah, and I work in this fucking area, and you tell me that every single night when all I want to do is go home. (looks at tourists listening) Just so you know, “free comedy show” means two drink minimum, and the so-called comedians are just dumb asses who are not not funny at all.
Comedy show ticket seller: Woah! Marry me, please. I'm not trying to be funny, you are fucking amazing!
Girl: Fuck you.
Comedy show ticket seller to tourists: I'm being serious, she's the woman of my dreams!
Tourists: What?
–Times Square
