Fun-Size Wednesday One-Liners

Jewish guy on cell: I finally got evangelized this week! (pause) It wasn't as much fun as I thought it was going to be.

–121st & Broadway

Lady on cell: Have fun with the… what do you call them… Oh, people!

—Shakespeare in the Park Line, Central Park

Overheard by: Megan W.

20-something male looking at painting: Hangings probably aren't as fun as they look.

–MoMa

Kid to his mother: Wow! The critics were right, this is the most fun you can have while sitting down!

–Outside Hairspray

Overheard by: DeDra

Posted on March 10, 2010
All Wednesday One-Liners, Central Park, Christianity, Compare/Contrast, Guys, Harlem & Morningside Heights, Jews, Judaism, Kids, MoMA, Moms, Movie Theaters, Names, On Cell, One-liners, Theater, Visual Art, Wednesday One-Liners, Weirdness, Women

Wednesnogsday One-Liners

White male to group of friends: I thought she was really into me… Then I turned around and she was kissing Mary.

–Pace University

Girl to boyfriend kissing her hand: Are you kissing my hand or wiping your nose?

–Central Park

Young boy to friend: Wow, lesbians kissing! I've only seen that on the internet!

–Grand Central Station

Black man to two men and two women making out indiscriminately: I thought all y'alls was gay, but now y'alls kissin' each other. I don't know what to think.

–Splash Bar

Posted on March 3, 2010
All Wednesday One-Liners, Bars & Clubs, Black People, Body Parts, Boys, Central Park, College, Couples, Friends, Gays and Lesbians, Grand Central, Guys, Internet, K-I-S-S-I-N-G, One-liners, Parks, Questions, Sexuality, Strangers, Train Station, Wednesday One-Liners, Weirdness, White People

The Final Solution to Wednesday One-Liners

College girl to friend: So I was looking through all my pictures… You know, all my pictures of Nazis.

–Central Park

Overheard by: ruegah

NYU film student to another, looking at picture of French actor Benoit Magimel: He's hot in that Hitler Youth kind of way.

–NYU Tisch Building

Guy to friend: Killing zombies is the new killing Nazis.

–1 Train

Overheard by: Preston

Random hipster: Sometimes I think Hitler was right.

–Music Hall of Williamsburg

Borders employee: I'm sorry, ma'am, we do have books about Hitler, but they're all for children.

–Borders

Posted on February 17, 2010
About Celebrities, All Wednesday One-Liners, Apologies, Beauty, Books & Writing, Central Park, Clerks, Compliments, Friends, Guys, Hipsters, Hitler/Nazis, Kids, KKK, Murder, NYU, On the Subway, One-liners, Parks, Physical appearance, Pictures, Store, Students, Stupidity, Theater, Vampires, Ghouls, and Ghosts, oh my!, Wednesday One-Liners, Weirdness, Williamsburg

Wednesday First-Trimester Liners

Mom to friend, as baby makes screeching sounds and bounces around in stroller: I swear I didn't do drugs while I was pregnant with her. But I did have quite a few raspberry martinis before I knew I was knocked up.

–Belmont Park Race Track

20-something woman on phone: I need to slap that bitch. I don't care she pregnant, her face ain't pregnant.

–Staten Island Ferry

Overheard by: Mike

Ghetto baby momma: And it was like I was giving birth on the toilet!

–Belmont Ave & 188th St

Overheard by: Toomuchinformation

Doctor to patient: You're not pregnant, you just have gas.

–W 204th St

Overheard by: JMS

Little girl on cell: Oh my god, I know! And I'm, like, "that's why you're fucking pregnant"!

–Central Park

Posted on February 17, 2010
All Wednesday One-Liners, Bitch-slap, Body Parts, Brooklyn, Central Park, Comebacks, Doctors, Drinking & Drunk People, Drugs, Farting & Burping, Ferry, Friends, Ghetto Chicks, Girls, Insults, Kids, Moms, Nicknames & name calling, On Cell, One-liners, Parents, Parks, Pregnancy & Birth Control, Staten Island Ferry, Street, Washington Heights and Inwood, Wednesday One-Liners, Weirdness

Someone's Been Reading Too Many Dan Brown Books

Girl #1: Look at all the hipsters. They're all going south. Must be some kind of hipster convention.
Girl #2: How do you know that way is south?
Girl #1: The road. It makes an s-shape. It must mean south. Right?

–Central Park

Posted on February 16, 2010
Central Park, Directions, Girls, Parks, Questions, Stupidity

Besides, Prices Are Always Inflated in the Park.

Hobo #1: I offered that squirrel five cents for sex.
Hobo #2: What's a squirrel going to do with a nickel?

–Central Park

Overheard by: Fogel

Posted on February 1, 2010
Animals & Nature, Central Park, Hobos, Money & Class, Offers and requests, Parks, Prostitution, Questions

Maybe She'd Tell Me I'm Pretty and That She Loves Me

Girl: I don't date much.
Guy: Why not?
Girl: Umm… No reason.
Guy: Are you a lesbian?
Girl: No!
Guy, pointing to a girl walking by: Would you date her?
Girl, thinking it over: I actually might.

–Central Park

Overheard by: Andrew