Guy #1: So are you from Canada?
Guy #2: No, New Jersey… It's kind of like Canada.
–112th St & Broadway
Guy #1: So are you from Canada?
Guy #2: No, New Jersey… It's kind of like Canada.
–112th St & Broadway
Little boy: My stomach hurts!
Teacher: How does it hurt? What does it feel like?
Little boy: It's… Almost like how it feels being pregnant.
–Public School, The Bronx
Large black guy: ' Scuse me, do you know David Jensen?
Attractive gay guy: Nope, sorry.
Large black guy: Oh, man, cuz you look just like him, have you ever been on tv? Friends?
Attractive gay guy: Nope.
Large black guy: What about Baywatch?
Attractive gay guy: Nope, sorry, pretty sure the last episode of Baywatch aired when I was eleven.
Large black guy: You must get all sorts of shorties, right?
Attractive gay guy: Ha! Well, maybe if I wasn't gay.
Large black guy: Oh, man! I'm gonna have David text you, look out for his number.
Attractive gay guy: Uhhh, sure thing.
Large black guy, one stop later, as they're both getting off the train: Yo, just so you know, ain't nothing like pussy.
–7 Train
Big guy #1: Naw, man I'm straight as a plate!
Big guy #2: A bumpy plate!
–Williamsburg
Overheard by: Taylor
Two-year-old boy to mom: And after dinner, it's butt-shaking time!
–Brooklyn Heights
Tot in stroller: Mommy, I want the tabouleh… Mommy! My tabouleh!
–Food Emporium
Little brother pestering older brother playing PSP: What do you like better, Nutella or A-Rod?
–Stanton Tailor Shop
Two-year-old, after falling to floor when train swerved: Mother, I resent that.
–G Train
Overheard by: Sunny
Sassy black woman: You think I would have brunch in Harlem? I wouldn't even have lunch in Harlem!
–D Train
Overheard by: laughing
Dramatic girl on cell: But I love you. I would go to Harlem and back for you!
–Starbucks
Girl: Wow, Harlem is like a cultural playground. There are stores and everything.
–Metro-North
Columbia freshman girl: I would never let anybody in Harlem touch my vagina.
–Columbia University
Overheard by: Meagan
Fat girl to friends: You know who I want to be? Motherfucking Rainbow Brite. Bitch had a flying horse.
–29th & 7th
20-something guy, following very loud clap of thunder: By the power of Greyskull!
–Center Boulevard, Long Island City
Overheard by: mixxy5
Hobo, to no one in particular: Find me on the computer; my name's Scooby-Doo.
–Starbucks
Cop to partner: God, working with you is like working with Stewie Griffin. (whiney) Briiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiaaaaaaan… Briiiiiiiiiiiiiiaaaaaan!
–Train
Large male #1: Let's go to the old train.
Large male #2: But this one is shiny.
Large male #1: Grease, fingerprints, herpes… I love it all.
–PATH Train
Teen girl to guy friend: What's your favorite football team?
Teen guy: Chiefs.
Teen girl: What state is that?
Teen guy: Red and yellow. Kansas City.
Teen girl: I don't know who that is.
–Q54 Bus
Saleslady #1: You look like one of those dolls. I forget what they're called.
Saleslady #2: A doll? Oh, like a Barbie?
Saleslady #1: Nah, not a Barbie. I forget what these dolls are called. They're kinda short…
Saleslady #2: Kinda short? A Bratz doll?
Saleslady #1: No… Ummm… No, not a Bratz doll… Oh yeah, they're called Trolls. You look like a Troll.
–Old Navy
Overheard by: MG
