Girls

Girl #1: My shit is green.
Girl #2: That’s cuz you’re a vegan!
Girl #1: Bitch, I shit money!

–Central Park

Girl #1: Ugh, Adam Lambert is soooo hot, it's too bad he's gay.
Girl #2: Just because he kisses other guys doesn't mean he's gay.
Girl #1: Um, I'm pretty sure that's exactly what it means. Now, come on, I feel like a slurpie or something.

–59th & 5th

Blond girl: So how are things with you and the boy?
Redheaded friend: I'm so happy I could shit a puppy!

–G Train

Overheard by: Rachel

Chick: So I e-mailed my building manager to complain about my jerk roommate, and she wrote back that the solution to all my problems is to chant. And she sent me the chant! Listen to this: “Nam yo ho ren ge cho.” And if I do this every day, I'll be happier, wiser, and in rhythm.
Dude: There are two possibilities here. Either she's enough of a flake to believe this, or she thinks you're enough of a flake to believe it.
Chick: None of this is good!

–151st & Broadway

Overheard by: Rose Fox

Black teen exiting train: Yo, you got a nice ass for a cracka.
White girl, after he's gone: Ugh, I wonder what he would have said if I were like “you got a nice face, for a negro.”

–F Train

Overheard by: i wonder too

Dad: King of the Hill?
Six-year-old daughter: Yeah!
Dad: Simpsons?
Six-year-old daughter: Yeah!
Dad: Alf?
Six-year-old daughter: Noooooooo.

–117th & Broadway

Rich girl, arguing with friend: You don't understand! I had a hard time this summer…I actually had to get a job!
Friend, in a sarcastic voice: You poor, poor creature…

–Times Square

Girl on cell: Yeah, so after I get the surgery, I’m not going to be able to drink or eat for, like, three months.
Friend, on speakerphone: Oh, man, that’s rough. Is there, like, a special diet you go on for that?
Girl on cell: I don’t know — I should look online. I’m sure plenty of people have done it before.

–Washington Square Park

Overheard by: Katrina

Girl #1: Sophie! Stop looking at your boobs!
Girl #2: I wasn't!
Girl #1: You totally were.
Girl #2: Well, the only reason you could tell that I was was that you look at your boobs all the time!
Girl #1: No, the reason I could tell was that you were like… (looks at boobs)
Girl #2: Liane! Stop looking at your boobs!

–Q Train

Overheard by: Sunny

Girl: I want some of those sunglasses, you know… Raybaums?
Boy: You mean Raybans? Dude, you just made him Jewish!

–Houston, Texas

Overheard by: Molly