Asian teen #1: I know this kid whose skin is orange. It's 'cause he grew up in Chernobyl.
Asian teen #2: What's Chernobyl?
–Stuyvesant High School
Overheard by: knows what Chernobyl is, at least
Asian teen #1: I know this kid whose skin is orange. It's 'cause he grew up in Chernobyl.
Asian teen #2: What's Chernobyl?
–Stuyvesant High School
Overheard by: knows what Chernobyl is, at least
Very heavy ten-year-old boy, yelling excitedly: I heard they have bacon flavored popcorn in Florida! I love the south!
–Flushing, Queens
Hipster girl on cell: The entire state of Mississippi isn't a complete waste of space, even though it seems like it right now.
–Atlantic & Smith, Brooklyn Heights
Wino, grabbing can of beer: Here's 15 cents. I'll get the rest of it for you today. I promise! I'm from Georgia, I know how this shit works!
–Deli at 33rd & 7th
Overheard by: EthanK
Loud girl to friend: Maria? Maria's not dead, Maria's in Virginia?
–BxM10 Bus
Overheard by: bxgirl
Girl to boyfriend: I mean, when someone says they're throwing an "Iowa State Fair"-themed wedding, you don't think twice about going!
–30th Ave, Astoria
Guy: They’re squatters and ravers. They squat and rave…They squave.
–Belle and Sebastian show, Battery Park
Overheard by: Lacey
Suit: You know how some people wing it? Well I wanged it. I totally wanged it.
–52nd & 7th
Overheard by: Jatmos
Asian guy: It seems like everyone is giving headjobs these days.
–Flinders St
Overheard by: duygu
Female nurse: I’m telling you, he is totally intercontinental. I have to change him 4 times a day.
–Hudson & Spring
Overheard by: AJ Stone
Wordsmith, on the phone: Ma’am, her train is being delayed because of constipation.
–Office, 1250 Broadway
Teen on cell: He’s not very smart…Yeah, I just need someone to conversate with.
–Macy’s
Overheard by: Chelsea
College guy: The word “secretion” just fucks me up.
–NYU
10-Year-Old boy: I ain’t speakin’ no language.
–B48 bus, Franklin & DeKalb
Overheard by: Kyri
Tourist: Sexual attention is the only language I really understand.
–Around the Clock Diner, Stuyvesant & 3rd Ave
Overheard by: gweny
Woman: The lesbians don’t like the Jews…I mean the Lebanese.
–Party, 16th & 1st
Girl: Stop staring at all the buildings, you look like a terrorist!…I mean tourist. Same thing.
–8th & Broadway
Overheard by: ceci
Girl: Oh, my shoes totally fell asleep…Fell asleep? Fell apart!
–Fort Greene Park, Brooklyn
Mother, pointing to a woman playing the musical saw: She is singing!
Son: No, She’s playing the saw.
Mother: There is an orchestra playing!
Son: It is a tape.
Mother: And she is singing?
Son. No. She is sawing.
Mother: What did you say?
Son: Go, have a look.
Mother: …….
Son: And?
Mother: It’s like singing.
Son: That’s it, the saw.
Mother: What a nice voice she has!
Son: She is not singing. It’s the saw that’s singing.
Mother: No way… She is singing into the saw?
Son: No, no singing. Just sawing.
Mother: But she is opening her mouth.
Son: She is breathing.
Mother: Are you sure she is not singing?
–Union Square subway station
Girl #1: Where did she go?
Girl #2: She went to the bathroom.
Girl #1: Why?
–Amtrak
Overheard by: mike the observer
Ditzy blonde: I know you’ll think this is stupid, but I was thinking of going to a life coach. A life coach or a really good psychic.
Brunette friend: You know what? I do think it’s stupid. Here, I’ll be your life coach: Fuck psychics, and go get a job. Oh, and don’t get fired this time. You’re fixed now.
–Metro North-Harlem
Comedy show promoter: Miss! You dropped a dreadlock!
Black woman with dreadlocks: Where? (worriedly searches the ground)
Comedy show promoter, holding flyer in her face as looks up: Just kidding! You like comedy?
–Union Square
Tourist lady #1: Hey look, there’s the Statue of Liberty!
Tourist lady #2: Then that must be Alcatraz!
–flight into LaGuardia
Overheard by: Jennifer
Tourist lady: Will we get to stop off at the Statue of Liberty on this bus trip?
–49th & Broadway
Overheard by: Brooke Rachel
Columbia professor [having just explained a relatively simple concept, turning to girl in front]: Do you understand this?
Girl: Yes.
Professor: Good. Because, you know, you’re really the canary in the coal mine for this class. If I can get you to get this, I’m set.
–Columbia University
Overheard by: Bobby
Tourist guy: Where are you from?
Female waitress: Sri Lanka.
Tourist guy: Oh, I've always wanted to go to India.
Female waitress: Did you really just say that?
–Times Square Bakery
Overheard by: trey
