Woman: Is angel a boy or a girl?
Teenager: Angel's a boy, mom.
Woman: But he sounds like a girl!
–Nederlander Theatre
Woman: Is angel a boy or a girl?
Teenager: Angel's a boy, mom.
Woman: But he sounds like a girl!
–Nederlander Theatre
Woman: God loves us all. It doesn't matter if you have a lot of money or where you come from. It's time for you to give yourself to him. Believe in god!
Man #1: Hey! Get off the PCP!
Man #2: Lady, shut the fuck up! Shut. The. Fuck. Up.
Woman: Well, I'm sorry you feel that way. (leaves)
–F Line, Church Ave Stop
Overheard by: carrieb
Woman making dolls dance: Eeeeee! Eeeeee! Eeeeee!
Young woman, waiting for her coffee: They're very cute.
Woman with dolls (still dancing them): They are. Eeeee!
Young woman: Did you make them?
Woman with dolls: Yes, I did.
Young woman: I like their little sweaters.
Woman with dolls: I didn't make the sweaters.
Young woman: Oh.
–Starbucks
Woman #1: You hear her dog died?
Woman #2: Who dog died?
Woman #1: Oprah's dog died.
(long pause)
Woman #2: So, anyway…
–Atlantic Ave, Brooklyn
45-year-old woman: So I ended up shaving it, and it looks so pretty! It's like I'm ten years old again!
–Houlihans Restaurant
Overheard by: remembers when she was ten years old
Girl on cell: Wait. The dad shaves the son's ass?
–Columbia University
Overheard by: McFreaky
Guy in shower to guy in the next: Man, I am never shaving my pubes again.
–Pratt Institute
Overheard by: traPt
Guy with a bunch of tattoos: The sex was great, but she was psychotic. Every time I shaved she would accuse me of having had oral sex with another woman.
–86th & Amsterdam
Overheard by: Alan
British woman on cell: Are you shaving? Your face or your balls?
–13th & Broadway
Overheard by: Just around
Middle aged lady on cell: Lots of people say Dallas is really nice. Lots of nice people, nice weather. What do you have against it?" (pause) That was in '63!
–M79
Party girl to cool guy: Why can't you let me be nice? I'm not nice to anyone.
–77th & York Ave
Overheard by: UES Suit
Flamboyantly gay guy to crowd of girls at Pinkberry: You know, I was just trying to do something nice, and this is how you treat me? Fuck y'all, I'm gonna be the next President. (storms off)
–St. Mark's
Overheard by: scarface
Garbage man to another: Man, Attica is the best prison. High class. That shit is nice!
–81st & Amsterdam
Overheard by: eliza
Suit on cell: I wonder what his wife is like. She's probably nice, but rich. You know what I mean.
–2nd Ave & 88th St
Woman on cell: Nice people just can't tell if they're pregnant.
–W Houston & Varick
Overheard by: courtney messer
Conductor: Stand clear of the doors. You are delaying service. (pause, then impatiently) Stand clear of the doors! You are delaying service! (pause) I will come back there and stab you if you do not get out of the doorway.
–Uptown 1 Train
Overheard by: Special K
Loud girl: I will stab someone just to prove a point.
–E 187th
Overheard by: Martian
Woman on cell walking little boy: I told you he was an asshole last weekend. (pause) Why did you expect any different? (pause) You ain't gonna stab no nigga. I'm gonna call you "Captain Stab 'em." (laughs) You always saying you gonna stab somebody!
–Manhattan Bridge
Overheard by: Lacy
20-something man: I know…I just couldn't pull out my sword fast enough.
–Canal St
Overheard by: Richard
Actor: Yeah, it's a great part! I play a father who stabs his son…
–M23 Bus
Young suit: Wouldn't it be awesome if, like, right across the street from my apartment we could buy fireworks? …and swords!
–81st & Broadway
Teen girl on cell: What?! His name was "food stamps?"
–Outside W 4th St Train Station
Woman waiting in line for a free iced coffee at Dunkin' Donuts: Daaaayum… It's crowded in here, like at the welfare office!
–Lower Manhattan
Overheard by: Matt
Thug (seeing the line for Dark Knight: Yo, this is longer than the welfare line!
–42nd St AMC Theaters
Overheard by: Angel
Drunk hobo in seriously bright yellow jump suit: Will you marry me? I got food stamps.
–Broadway, Astoria
Guy on cell: What? Yeahhh, her momma's been on welfare so long her food stamps bounced.
–3rd Ave & 11th St
Overheard by: nycpuhlease
20-year-old girl on cell: Yeah, I got the dress, it was like $100. I tried on matching pumas and I'm gonna go back to get those tomorrow. Hold on, I have another call.
(pause) Hello? Let me call you back, I'm on my way to pick up my welfare check.
–M2 Bus
Drunken guy to stoned guy: I would kiss you, but you might remember.
–Columbia University
Overheard by: Lo
Girl: And so he's like, "I kissed you on the mouth last night", and I'm like "oh really? I didn't know."
–Prospect Park
Overheard by: jaytro
Dude on cell: Yeah, bro, leave it to me. I decide to cheat on my wife and I end with some stupid whore who wants to play kissie-face in a fucking Newark parking lot.
–Penn Station
Overheard by: AdHoculi
Cute girl approaches frat boy at bar: I was going to pretend I don't know you, but I do know you, and now I think I want to kiss you. Is that okay?
–Clinton & Montague, Brooklyn Heights
Latina girl on cell: Well, my cousin died two years ago, right, and on the one-year anniversary that's when I kissed him.
–Outside Victoria Fashions, 116th & 3rd
Overheard by: Chuckles
Older German woman with accent: So when she was little she used to take a bunch of sleeping pills and lay on the floor, and she wouldn't get up until someone kissed her! It was so cute!
–1 Train
Overheard by: EthanK
Old German man: Last night those people were staring at us. All of them, staring!
Old American woman: Yeah, they were. I wonder why.
Old German man: I bet they were German too, I wonder if they could tell I was German.
Old American woman: You were dressed pretty classy.
–LaGuardia Airport
Overheard by: Jake
