Girl #1: You’re a doctor?
Girl #2: Yeah–you didn’t know that?
Girl #1: Well, I only know you on a wrestling level.
Girl #3: Wow, that is *so* New York.
–Rooftop party, Bedford St, Brooklyn
Overheard by: Gnomies
Girl #1: You’re a doctor?
Girl #2: Yeah–you didn’t know that?
Girl #1: Well, I only know you on a wrestling level.
Girl #3: Wow, that is *so* New York.
–Rooftop party, Bedford St, Brooklyn
Overheard by: Gnomies
Woman to another woman: It’s really the same thing. Like six and a half of another dozen.
–Times Square Subway Station
Overheard by: Billy
Black woman: He gets four weeks paid vacation! Four weeks! That’s like two months!
–34th & Broadway
Auntie someone: Yeah, my brother has like 18 kids and I ain’t even met like a hundred of ’em!
–Brooklyn
Overheard by: Ilysse Weisenfeld
Crazy man: I just decided to become a decimal point.
–3 Train
Overheard by: Cool, cuz im a period.
Delivery truck guy, counting boxes: 18 plus 20 equals 30, plus 22 is 42.
–Midwood, Brooklyn
Overheard by: Feliz Navidad
Girl on cell: Yeah, no. Five times eight is forty… I think… Well, hopefully, anyway.
–Waverly & Broadway
Overheard by: Kyla
Guy #1: So how come you’re late?
Guy #2: The conductor on the train held us in the station cause some woman was sick… All I could think was: “How dare this bitch get sick on my train?”
–Brooklyn Tech High School
Overheard by: kreuzweg
DOB lady #1: You ever see that stupid show, Family Guy?
DOB lady #2, with conviction: No. I don’t get involved in that mess. It’s a place you won’t come out.
–Brooklyn Dept. of Buildings
Overheard by: Choheat
Jamaican man on cell: First there is the white people, then comes the animals, then comes me!
–Bryant Park
Overheard by: Cog-in-the-wheel
White hipster: Don’t let the white man bring you down!
–N. 6th & Bedford Ave
Black man, yelling at UGG-wearing Fordham student passing by: White girls get loving, too. But, not with those boots!
–E. Fordham Rd & Bathgate Ave
Guy with rosary: Yo, that girl used to be so bad. Now she’s hanging out with white people and playing croquet. Or whatever that shit is.
–North Woods, Central Park
Cute black girl: Damn! White girls be steppin’ it up! They got booties now and everything!
–106th & Broadway
Hobo, to commuters: I’m hungry, homeless, and unemployed. I’m selling these candies for $0.25 so I can buy a meal. You’re all going to die, and you can’t take it with you, so give it to me!
–Shuttle to Times Square
Overheard by: Wondering why he couldn’t just eat the candy…?
Girl: So she was like: "Why can’t we have a candy corn background?" and I was like "Because you’re an idiot!"
–Starbucks, 34th St
Overweight yet stylish gay man: She had a hunger deep inside her that only a Snickers could quench.
–M101 Bus
Overheard by: Holla Back Girl
Mother to young son: You can get something, but I don’t want you to pick out no fucking twenty dollar candy. You ain’t been that good.
–Hershey World, Times Square
Overheard by: esgeness
Professor to student: I found out what they put in their brownies, I plan to use it against them!
–101st & Broadway
Group of high school girls to Mister Softee ice cream truck driver: Hey ice cream man! Ice cream man! Give us some ice cream! We’ll suck you off!
–Beverley & Ocean Parkway
Overheard by: A Radiant Sulk Ninja
Annoying hipster: Hey man, you still have that hook up for blow?
Guy #1: No man, he went under, I have a new connection now. Just go to the second bodega at the corner and ask the guy for a fairy dust pizza.
Annoying hipster: Really, alright man, thanks.
Guy #2, after hipster leaves: That’s not true, is it?
Guy #1: Of course not.
–Meserole St
Dude on cell: I’m okay with it. As long as nobody slaps me or calls me gay or spits on me. Those are my three things. As long as nobody does those three things.
–21st St & 8th Ave
Asian girl: You gave me the gay!
–C Train
Overheard by: Jordan
Female cop to male cop: You a queer? For real, you queer? You a queer? You a queer? Oh, I didn’t know that. Okay. [Nods.]
–C Train
Barnard girl to friends: I don’t think he’s gay, I just think he has problems having sex with women.
–Columbia University Steps
Overheard by: John Jay
Man to friend: See, I told you this was a gay neighborhood, look at all the women!
–Montague Street, Brooklyn Heights
Overheard by: glekapolis
Loudly homophobic guy: Gay! Gay! My ass hurts from watching that preview!
–AMC Theater, Times Square
Overheard by: Lo
Woman with thick Jersey accent, very seriously: I really need to get an accent. Accents are very important to people here.
–1 Train
Overheard by: McFreaky
Drunk man screaming into cell: Stop fucking yelling!
–30th & 8th
Guy on phone: It just really bugs me that she’s always talking to other people about our relationship…
–Bedford & 4th, Williamsburg
Overheard by: andebobandy
Aussie bartender with heavy accent: He was complaining that the burger wasn’t flat because it’s hand-rolled and not frozen. [pause] Fucking foreigners.
–O’Keefe’s, Court Street, Brooklyn
Overheard by: NJH
Guy in wheelchair (peeing in a Snapple bottle) to friend: People are nasty.
–W 38th St & 8th Ave
Overheard by: Bebe
Sad Latino dude: She said no.
Outraged Latino dude: What?!? How could she say no?! After all the time you spent thinking about her ass!
–Willoughby & Taafe, Brooklyn
Overheard by: jacob
