Girl on cell: Well you know, when in Rome. Who said that, was it Jesus? I think it was Jesus.
–Penn Station
Overheard by: Nathalie
Girl on cell: Well you know, when in Rome. Who said that, was it Jesus? I think it was Jesus.
–Penn Station
Overheard by: Nathalie
Woman stopping passersby: Do you know the Chinese restaurant on either 8th or 9th? (points at buildings on 14th Street)
–14th St & b/w 7th & 8th Ave
Girl to another: What is jizz?
–NYU Freshman Dorm
Overheard by: Betty Noir
Man in all seriousness to restaurant server holding two plates of food: Do you guys serve food here?
–Las Ramblas Tapas Restaurant
Woman on cell: Do you think they have batteries in the Dominican Republic, or should I buy some?
–Gateway Center, Brooklyn
Overheard by: DominicanEnergizer
Tourist woman: Excuse me, do I go Uptown or Downtown?
–Delancey St
Overheard by: TR
Bewildered girl in Persian class: Does Iran have lightning?
–NYU
Man screaming into phone: We've been having fun and fun and fun. The thing we ain't having is fucking sex!
–Greenpoint
Overheard by: LisaLisa
Psych prof: Now, I don't know anyone who's ever died from not having sex. Maybe they tried to get some and failed in some horrible way that led to their demise, but I don't know anyone who's actually died from not having sex. (later) If you go on a starvation diet, which I don't recommend, be sure to drink water because, uh, you will die.
–Barnard College
Overheard by: High Aspirations
Guy to friend: He's fucking 57 years old and he's still a fucking virgin.
–W Broadway & Thomas
Gay man to straight female friend: I haven't had sex in almost two years… I need to get a dog.
–G Train
Overheard by: Sunny
Angry teen on cell: I'm not gonna pay 18 dollars for a wedgie!
–Lingerie Department, Macy's
Overheard by: me neither
Girl on cell: I don't have a problem with camping, but why do they have to give me a sleeping bag? Can't they give me linens? It's not like I'm not giving them an insignificant amount of money.
–W Broadway & Grand
Suit on cell: At first I was only making $30,000 a year, but last year I got shot in the foot, and then I got a $1,000 bonus, so now I'm making $32,000 a year. Shit!
–F Train
Overheard by: Brittany Smith
Loud woman on cell: I like and don't mind fucking you, but I need to get paid. I'm unemployed right now.
–108th & Broadway
Elevator operator for observatory, upon leaving: Please come again! We want your money.
–Empire State Building
Old guy in dark suit to young guy in dark suit: You're not embezzling money!
–48th & 8th
Suit on cell: It's not that I don't like people, I just think that they're expendable.
–Union Square Cafe
20-something to visiting family: We are about to go up a bunch of stairs. If you complain, you will be pushed back down them.
–Mulberry & Canal
Laughing suit to others: So, yeah, I just stepped over the body.
–42nd St & 5th Ave
Mother to small crying child: Honey, I did listen to you, but I can't make myself care.
–V Train
Overheard by: Hunter
Older woman to friend: Down there where the servants are, you know, where the gardening people and the kitchen is, I don't go there. I just don't go there.
–38th & 5th
Overheard by: garden in manhattan?
Greek Princess shopping for wedding rings: This isn't the more expensive ring I wanted but we just bought an apartment in the 70s.
–Tiffany's Second Floor
Overprivileged teenage girl on cell: The bourgeoisie… The bourgeoisie are like, the common people.
–Union Square
College girl: No, I mean seriously: who, by the age of 25, has not been to Rome or Florence?
–Fordham University, Lincoln Center
Overheard by: Dan
Six-year-old: Mommy, how do you spell "Forbes"?
–Restaurant, Upper East Side
Overheard by: jess
Chatty woman: There were two lesbians, or transsexuals, or whatever you call it…
–26th St & Park Ave
Overheard by: Rose Fox
Crazy shouting hobo: Lesbians are rapists! Lesbians are rapists! You stick your tongue in a pussy, you're a rapist! Rapist lesbians! Lesbians are rapists!
–E Train
Woman on cell: Of course I thought she was a lesbian! She walked like a dude!
–Sunset Park, Brooklyn
Overheard by: Laura
Middle aged woman to male on train, in one breath: Scientists say that in 2012 the sun will line up with the milky way and change the axle on the earth and you know it is hard to be a black lesbian cause most of these women just get tired of men and have sex with a woman but that doesn't mean they are bisexual just because they have sex with men and women and they ain't really lesbians they just think they are cause they have sex with women…
–D Train
Overheard by: thomas
Normal-looking girl to girlfriends: Do you know how many woman hit on me when I was in San Francisco?
–Bedford & 6th
Man on street: Does anybody need a lesbian lover? Because I'll get a sex change…
–79th St & Broadway
Girl to another: And she went to get into her car. I was like "you'd better get out of here or I'm gonna fuck you up." And she was all slamming the door and stopping over to me. And I was all in her face and bitch-slapped her. Well, that last part might have been a dream. But then she got into her car and left.
–NY Central Library
Overheard by: amused
Woman on cell: Hi, Annie! How are you? (pause) I'm going to get my ass kicked by a very big black man.
–Park Slope
Suit on cell: If you don't stop hanging up on me, I will kick you in the throat.
–Times Square
Guy on cell, very loudly: Yeah, but, so nobody knows about it except me and the other guys in the fight club.
–21st St & Broadway
Overheard by: Alex
20-something girl: And then she chloroformed me. (pause) I said that too loud.
–Penn Station
Overheard by: Russ
Guy on cell: I got fired on Thursday. I was 10 minutes late and they fired me, can you believe it?…Oh come on, it was my first day!
–1st Ave & 9th St.
Middle-aged man, into his cell phone: It’s an oneg-shabbat. It’s just a big dinner where everyone can meet each other and talk. It’s only a few hundred dollars for you to sponsor it. [pause] Well, it’s really not a dinner. It’s just some fruit and plates for people to pick at.
— Midtown
