Nobody Knows the Trouble Wednesday One-Liners Seen

Hobo to white guy walking with three black friends: What's up, slave owner?

–The Village

Girl on phone: We should practice selling ourselves to each other.

–Subway Sandwiches, 38th & 7th

Crazy man on train: America! America! Anybody wanna buy some white people?

–A Train

Ditzy girl to friend: So I had this black boyfriend one time, and we had to break up because he kept talking about slavery. I was all, hello, I'm Czech, my people were slaves too.

–Columbia University School of Social Work

Overheard by: Eric

Black toddler to mortified white nanny: Wanna play slave?

–Carroll Gardens, Brooklyn

Posted on July 10, 2015
All Wednesday One-Liners, Black People, Breaking Up, Brooklyn, Chelsea & the Meatpacking District, Columbia (& Barnard), Columbia University, Crazies, Crazy, Friends, Girls, Guys, History & Geography, Hobos, Kids, On the Subway, One-liners, Questions, Race, Restaurants & Cafes, Shopping, Should've Used a Condom, Street, The Village, Wednesday One-Liners, Weirdness, White People, Wishes & desires, Women

Wednesday One-liners, Chronic Matriculators

Guy: Ooh, actuarial, eh? That’s like birds, right?

–Silver Center, Washington Square East

Overheard by: Chirag Shah

Posted on July 10, 2015
Animals & Nature, Arts & Letters, Books & Writing, Brooklyn, College, Dating, Fordham, History & Geography, Manhattan, NYU, On Cell, One-liners, Park Slope, Relationships, Sex & Relationships, Stupidity, The Bronx, Union Square and East Village

The Natural Wonder of Wednesday One-liners

Chick: There are so many homeless people around today. Like they’ve come out of hibernation or something.

–Penn Station

Overheard by: isabelle

Chick: I hate this museum. It’s filled with stuffed monkeys who all look like they’re crying.

–D train at 81st St, Natural History Museum

Posted on July 9, 2015
Animals & Nature, Arts & Letters, Hobos, Manhattan, Midtown & Hell's Kitchen, More museums, On the Subway, One-liners

Wednesday One-Liners for Kendra

Young lady: Stupid people have more fun!

–Chrystie & Housten

Overheard by: Probably True…

Middle age woman to young woman pushing stroller: Well, this is a stupid place for a stroller!

–Times Square

Overheard by: Would the street be safer?

Oversized hip-hop boyfriend to undersized girlfriend: I'm being stupid for your benefit.

–Duane Reade

Woman buying ibuprofen: It's not a virus. My mother's got a headache from everyone being stupid.

–Inwood

Overheard by: Rose Fox

Girl smoking on the sidewalk to smoking friend: He's perfect. Except that he's kind of dumb. But he's perfect!

–34th St & Madison Ave

Overheard by: Katface

Posted on July 8, 2015
All Wednesday One-Liners, Compare/Contrast, Couples, Customers, Duane Reade, Fat People, Friends, Girls, Health and Hygiene, Insults, Kids, Murray Hill and Gramercy, One-liners, Parents, Smokers & Smoking, Street, Stupidity, Times Square, Wall Street, TriBeCa, South Street Seaport, Washington Heights and Inwood, Wednesday One-Liners, Women

The Wednesday One-liners Method Acting Method

Matt Dillon: This theatre has awful feng shui.

–Union Square Regal Cinemas

Posted on July 8, 2015
Asians, Bars & Clubs, Celebrities Overheard, Manhattan, On the Subway, One-liners, Park Slope, People, Teens, Tourists, Union Square and East Village, Vendors & Street Performers, Wall Street, TriBeCa, South Street Seaport, Williamsburg

Wednesday One-Liners Will Swallow for Diamonds

Mother to five-year-old daughter: That's why she's a very smart woman. She married a very rich man for exactly that reason.

–University Place &10th St

Overheard by: evanescent

Homeless man to little boy with parents: Ask your mama why she marry your daddy. She'll tell you it was for the money.

–Statue of Liberty

Sorority girl to another: So like, do you think Brad makes good investments?

–53rd & 1st

Asian girl on cell: It's like I have a sign that says "trophy wife" written across my forehead, and then they find out I'm 22 and the sign is suddenly in neon.

–Tribeca

Girl on cell: No, you remember, I'm going to be a gold-digger! It's like a hooker, but smarter.

–NYU Classroom

Posted on July 6, 2015
About Celebrities, Age/Aging, All Wednesday One-Liners, Asians, Classroom, Families, Family Ties, Girls, Hobos, Kids, Marriage, Midtown & Hell's Kitchen, Moms, Money & Class, NYU, On Cell, One-liners, Parents, Prostitution, Questions, Sorority Girls, Street, The Village, Wall Street, TriBeCa, South Street Seaport, Wednesday One-Liners, Weirdness

We Heart Wednesday One-Liners, Now More Than Ever

Guy to friend: Oowee! Some weed and a perm! That's my perfect New York day.

–West Village

Overheard by: Joe

Conductor: Step in, stand clear…let's go New York!

–1 Train

Overheard by: Ashley Nelson

Intoxicated creepster: Are we in Manhattan? What the hell! This city is so full of New Yorkers!

–St. Mark's Place

Overheard by: Lizzzzz

Bitter man on subway: I think one summer here would cure them of any love they have for this town.

–1 Train

Passerby to surprised-looking wife, watching fight: They're fighting. It's New York, that's what people do in this city.

–City Hall

Overheard by: ascorbique & almost famous

Grinning paramedic to female tourist in shock, strapping her to backboard after she was struck by a car: Welcome to New York!

–34th St & 7th Ave

Overheard by: Mateo que Feo

Posted on July 5, 2015
Accidents, All Wednesday One-Liners, Chelsea & the Meatpacking District, Conductors, Couples, Creepsters, EMTs, Fighting and ass kicking, Friends, Gripes, Guys, Love, Men, On the Subway, One-liners, Only in New York, Public Transportation, Questions, Street, Tourists, Union Square and East Village, Wall Street, TriBeCa, South Street Seaport, Wednesday One-Liners, Weed, Weirdness, West Village

Doctor, It Hurts When I Wednesday My One-Liners!

White college girl: I would definitely want to be a doctor, if I didn't have to go to medical school.

–Fordham University

Nurse to another: Well, it seems that the themes of the day were UTIs and pregnancies.

–NYU Student Health Center

Overheard by: had neither

Black male pre-teen to mother: I know all about doctors, 'cause I watch shows about that. (pause) Actually, I watch Dr Phil.

–1 Train

Guy to two girls: I had to fire my doctor, I didn't like what he told me.

–39th & Lexington

Doctor, drawing on napkin and displaying results to student: This is you…in 40 years, in a fugue state. In Turkey. Dissociative fugue–learn neurology!

–168th & Fort Washington