Woman in Santa Claus costume, looking lost: Excuse me, honey, do you live around here?
Girl: Yeah.
Woman in Santa Claus costume: Do you know where there's a bar called Johnson, or Hold My Johnson, or something?
Girl, laughing: Johnson's? It's right across the street.
–Rivington St
Overheard by: hahahaha
Girl to cashier: Do you have any locations in North Carolina?
Cashier to girl: No, we only have locations on the East and West coasts.
–Store, Grand Central
Girl #1: I've got some really good pot at home.
Girl #2: Nah, let's just go to my mom's house.
–Temple of Dendur, The Metropolitan Museum of Art
Overheard by: Thanks for looking at the paintings
Girl #1: Thank god we are in singles next year.
Girl #2: Yeah, I'm getting a vibrator.
–Barnard College
Girl with camera to group of friends: No, get in front of the train tracks so I can take a picture!
Friend: We look like such tourists.
Girl with camera: No, I swear, if I lived here, I'd take pictures all the time.
–Lower East Side
Overheard by: Benny
Drunk girl: Hey, you know that girl over there?
Sober friend: Yeah.
Drunk girl: She's… She's a virgin… In all ways.
–F Train
Girl: Ohhhh, this is the building that King Kong climbed up, right?
Guy: Yeah.
Girl: Wow. That would have been so scary to live here when that happened!
–In Line for Elevator at Empire State Building
Overheard by: Bella
Mother to grown daughter, as they huddle together: It's freezing!
(after a few minutes)
Mother: You're not warm yet?
Daughter: I'd be a lot warmer if I crawled up your crotch. (laughs)
Mother: You can't crawl up mommy's crotch anymore, now can you? You're too big!
–LIRR
Girl ordering patties: I'd like a beef and a veggie patty.
Guy working at patty shop: Before I get those, I want to say you are beautiful. I bet you've heard that five times today.
Girl: Oh, thanks, I've just been working out for an hour. Well, I've been doing yoga.
Guy: Yoga? But you're black!
Girl: Black people do yoga, too!
–Jamaican Pride, Flatbush
Overheard by: Chris R.
Girl: I feel like she's really good at illegal stuff.
–34th & 9th
Overheard by: hellothere
Haggard-looking woman, screaming into cell: What? Now you're gettin' locked up and I am going to fucking prison now! Perfect! (sprints out of store)
–King Kullen, Staten Island
Preteen to another: So when you get arrested and your mom asks you where you were, you weren't with me.
–1st Ave & 16th
Overheard by: Wes Mantooth
Female teen to another: Yeah, that's what my dad got arrested for, too.
–Central Park
Teen boy on cell: I get a lot of shit from authority figures. Especially when I'm getting arrested.
–Carroll Gardens, Brooklyn
Overheard by: The Man(dy)
