Man with beer #1: I love you, beer. You satisfy me in ways my wife never could.
Man with beer #2 to other man: You satisfy me in ways my wife never could…
–NJT to Penn Station
Overheard by: Geologist
Man with beer #1: I love you, beer. You satisfy me in ways my wife never could.
Man with beer #2 to other man: You satisfy me in ways my wife never could…
–NJT to Penn Station
Overheard by: Geologist
Suit #1: Yeah, you know the San Andreas Fault?
Suit #2: What about it?
Suit #1: Well you know, dude, it's like the nation's asscrack.
–40th St & Lexington
Overheard by: Remind me not to live there…
Teen in sideways cap: I touched it, but I didn't like it.
–Uptown A Train
Overheard by: Ladle
Student: Dude, I think I'm dyslexic with stairs.
–Stuyvesant High School
Teen, seriously: No… Webkinz are definitely a lot more high-maintenance then neopets.
–Downtown 6 Train
Teenage boy: I want to be a Senator or something like that. Like, the Government is the best place to have sex.
–Bard High School, Queens
Overheard by: Sunny
Punk teen to friends: Even though it seemed like she was into things, now she's not into anything.
–Union Square
Overheard by: i don't like stuff either
20 year-old guy: What if the afterlife and hell exists? I mean if it does, there has to be a society because billions of people would be there by now.
Friend: Yeah…
20 year-old: So that's a lot of people, like a society has to emerge since there can't be that many demons and torturers. You would have like a McDonald's and people working there. (pause) But you could be working there, and it could be every day for an eternity.
Friends: That's so much worse than hell.
–New Jersey Transit, Port Authority Bus Terminal
Big black man: It’s ok, I’m not a gangsta!
Nerdy white kid: Neither am I!
–Times Square
Neighbor #1: So your baby is finally here!
Neighbor #2: Yeah, she was born on Tuesday. 8 lbs, 20 inches…
Crazy guy walking by: Well, I'm 25 inches.
–Garment District
Professor: Wisdom goes: if you are looking to get married, and you can either choose a nine who is broke or a seven with a lot of money, you choose the…?
Students, without missing a beat: Seven!
–Hunter College
Girl #1: No one likes him… I feel bad for him.
Girl #2: I feel bad for the homeless people in the city who have no legs.
–Staten Island Mall
Middle-aged girl #1: Yes, she was sincerely apologetic for the things that she’d done, and she really took responsibility for them.
Middle-aged girl #2: She must have a new therapist.
(both nod sagely)
–1 Train
Overheard by: Suze V
12-year old girl: Just because we watch porn together doesn't mean we have sex together.
12-year old boy: Stop lying, you whore.
–Mulberry & Canal
Overheard by: Tara G
