Man walking down the street in downtown Vancouver to the woman next to him: “I’m Jewish, but my family has been in Canada for three generations”
Woman: “Oh. I have one Jewish friend.”
Man walking down the street in downtown Vancouver to the woman next to him: “I’m Jewish, but my family has been in Canada for three generations”
Woman: “Oh. I have one Jewish friend.”
Woman #1: Oh, hi. How are you?
Woman #2: Oh… Okay… I think I have diarrhea.
–Columbia University
Overheard by: vm
Man in elevator on cell: Yeah. That's what I'm paying for, right? Next time just make sure it's a male to female.
–Elevator, Chelsea
Staten Island man to son: Okay, you have to be careful here. And don't touch any of the pretty ladies: the prettier they are, the more likely it's a man.
–1st & Houston
Middle aged woman to friend: Every morning I wake up and think I look more and more like Mrs Doubtfire.
–Union Square
Overheard by: mk
Guy in pink spandex to Victorian Gardens employee: Excuse me, where do the trannies hang out?
–Central Park
Preppy chick to friends: Did I ever tell you guys about the tranny I slept with?
–19th St & 6th Ave
Overheard by: Well-Dressed Indian Boy
Mom, in motherly voice, to crying four-year-old: Aww, what's the matter, did the little transvestite scare you?
–2nd & 72nd
Overheard by: Nancy
Music manager on phone: You know what you need? Lesbians! Everyone needs a lesbian.
–20th St & 5th Ave
Overheard by: LoRna
Lady on cell: And now she thinks I’m a lesbian because I borrowed her…
–Union Square Greenmarket
Overheard by: borrowed her what?
Guy on cell: Did you bring chairs and a cooler? Cause usually lesbians are so prepared, they always bring chairs and a cooler.
–Ludlow near Rivington
English woman (trying on a pair of vintage men inspired shoes) to man: I always thought there was something very chic about a woman wearing a man’s shoe. (looks at her footwear) But I have to be skinny for this look, otherwise I’ll look like a lesbian!
–Frock Vintage Store
Overheard by: Shoegal
Guy to friend: She isn’t a lesbian but she does own a house.
–13th & 1st
Drunk: Come on! Just come upstairs with me!
Mistress: No way! Not this time; go home to your wife.
Drunk: But my wife’s not home!
–Battery Park City
Woman on crutches: Do you have a cold?
Woman with red nose: Yedd. I'b geddig over it.
Woman on crutches: Oh my god, we're all falling apart!
–26th St & Park Ave
Overheard by: Rose Fox
Suit to woman blocking left side of escalator: Politely excuse me, could you move aside? (woman waves man around and keeps chatting on cell)
Suit, politely: Ma'am, you should stay to the right if you are standing.
(woman angrily waves, mutters)
Suit, pushing her past: Fucking cunt!
Woman, politely: Fuck you, bitch.
–WTC PATH Station
Overheard by: Mondo Man
Woman: Ooh, where are you taking them?
Dogwalking guy: To pee on your leg.
–21st between 2nd & 3rd
Hipster to friend having problems with ATM card: Maybe it's for normal people and you're just abnormally large.
–Village ATM
Overheard by: rafa
Overenthusiastic father of new skater: Oh, you know, it's her first time, so I wanted to make sure that I was there to help her through it so that it'd be extra-special for her.
–Wollman Rink, Central Park
Overweight woman: Where's Wang? Guys, where's Wang?
–Hard Rock Cafe
Tourist mom: It's not big enough to impress me.
–Grand Central
Overheard by: Not The Empire State, Surely
Loud woman: It was a three-legged pussy!
–Union Square Subway Station
Overheard by: Rachel K
Modern literature professor, after ending class early: Well, that's it, I've blown my load.
–Columbia University
Man: Bitch, why you gotta make things so complicated?
Woman: I’m always complicated. You oughta be used to it by now.
Man: Yeah, that’s true.
–14th St crosswalk
Overheard by: Leslie
