Gangsta #1: Yo man, that shit ain't coo.
Gangsta #2: I know, wutchu gon' do wit dat?
Southern tourist to friends, whispering: I think that's what they call e-bo-nics.
–Downtown R Train
Gangsta #1: Yo man, that shit ain't coo.
Gangsta #2: I know, wutchu gon' do wit dat?
Southern tourist to friends, whispering: I think that's what they call e-bo-nics.
–Downtown R Train
Woman to friend: Look, I just don't want to be born again, okay? I saw how you attacked that Jewish woman in the airport.
–Broadway & 10th St
Overheard by: Stephanie
Patron: Jews for Jesus are just reformed black panthers.
–Turkish Kitchen, 3rd Ave
Overheard by: Pola
Student who has just drawn a stereotypical Jew to another who has drawn Jesus on the cross: Wait–wait, Jesus was Jewish?
–Bronx High School Of Science, Judaic Cultural Society
Girl at birthday supper: I get all Jewish and entitled when anyone tries to tell me "no!"
–8th Ave & 43rd St
Overheard by: Lankyguy
Jock to another: And then he like tried to fuck me. I guess that's what I get for spending the night at a dude's house. I mean he was Jewish and all, so he was really nice but still…
–23rd St & Lexington
Gluttony
Cashier lady: Damn, thank the Lord it's Friday! I'ma go to the heights and get me some margaritas and some quesadittas and get drunk and fat and happy. Damn!
–Duane Reade
Overheard by: Sam
Lust
Woman to male friend: Oh, that sucks! I'm such a whore…
–5th Ave & 12th St
Greed
Teenager on school field trip eating sushi and talking to chaperon: Daddy, can I borrow some money for the gift shop? My credit card is down to its last $200.
–Metropolitan Museum of Art Cafe
Sloth
Hipster, seeing that there was construction on the train: Ugh, what are we–going to have to walk places now?
–L Train
Wrath
Library staff: Group study room people, we know who you are. Because we have your IDs. Please come downstairs and pick them up so we don't have to unleash our wrath on you.
–Brooklyn College Library
Envy
Two woman walking tall dog: I mean… can you believe that I used to carry him in my Givenchy bag and wrap him in cashmere as a puppy? I would be jealous!
–Bleecker & Spring
Pride
Girl, grabbing her ass: Don't you just love my ass? My ass rocks. I love my ass!
–Battery Park
Train conductor: This is New York Penn Station. New York Penn. For those of you who are just waking up, this is Penn Station. If you are supposed to get off at New York Penn, wake up and get off now! (train leaves) Those of you who are just waking up: if you were supposed to get off at New York Penn Station, you just missed it! I told you to get up!
–Amtrak Train
College guy: Last night I woke up on an oriental rug and I had no idea where I was.
–Sheep Meadow, Central Park
Hispanic lady: Quiet down, some people are trying to sleep!
–6 Train
Man to friend: She can sleep in the closet.
–Brooklyn
Overheard by: Wait what?
Loud pharmaceutical salesman to doctor: They say that New York is the city that never sleeps, right? You know why? You know why? Herpes!
–Doctor's Office, Astoria
Woman on cell: So I walked into a room and she's there, chained to a chair. And he had a gun, pointing it at me, saying he was gonna shoot me. Then I started crying. And he fucking shot her. (people on bus look worried) And then I woke up.
–M4 Bus
Overheard by: trev
Professor: I don't know why any of us are here… It's gorgeous out and there are very lovely ladies wearing minimal clothing!
–NYU
Overheard by: Ginger
College girl in short skirt to friend: My ass feels naked and exposed, that's how I feel.
–Grand Central
Overheard by: Ilysse Weisenfeld
Man to woman: She's really starting to perfect the "slutty flight attendant" look.
–Penn Station
Overheard by: Glory
Woman, with pride: My gynecologist wears leather mini skirts and platform shoes!
–Park Slope
Female suit: I am the worst lawyer ever. That's why I dress like a slut. I always win.
–L Train
Girl to 20-something friend: Apparently, you can get pregnant if he looks at you across a crowded room!
(shocked pause)
20-something: Oh my god! Are you serious, I can?
Girl, glaring at friend: Are you serious? Asshole!
–Franklin Ave, Brooklyn
Queer #1 to friend: I could have been drinking.
Queer #2, coming out of London Boutique: But I was shopping!
Queer #1: But now I'm sober!
–Christopher & Bleecker
Overheard by: Colleen Elizabeth Campagna
Teenage girl to friend: Boyfriends are so overrated, except not really because I really want one.
–Lincoln Center
Guy: I don't care if her new boyfriend is god–I will kick his ass!
–Church St
Overheard by: Steve
Guy to friend: Yeah, she's in Jamaica. How fucked up is that? She's 20 and in Jamaica with her boyfriend. I'm 25 and I'm standing on a train next to you.
–Metro-North
Art student: I wanna write a diary, like, "8:45, kill boyfriend."
–NYU
Man on street selling knockoff perfume: C'mon ladies, buy this perfume. It will help you get a boyfriend! Don't get a cheap boyfriend, get some cheap perfume!
–34th & 7th
Overheard by: Kiran
Girl to friend: From now on, I am only having sex with one boyfriend.
–Marlow & Sons
Loud bar patron, reading new item on menu: Anybody know what artisan cheese is? Anybody at all? (mutters) Shit man, this is Astoria, we don't know no artisan cheese.
–Astoria
Overheard by: Jesse
Guy: He said "when you cum yourself." I looked at him and said "that is not how you say that."
–Hunter College
Overheard by: Jill
Girl to friend: So, you see, I was right! It's spelled w-h-e-r-e!
–McDonald's
Guy: And stop trying to rhyme words with other words.
–16th St & 8th Ave
Guy to girl: I am really into words, especially long ones. I love them, and like, collect them. There is a word for people like that, but it's pretty long, so I can't remember it.
–Q Train
Overheard by: Eavesdropper
Lady: He doesn't speak English good, so he gots deported.
–Park Slope
College girl to friend, disappointed: You know? I only made out with one of them…
–NYU Dorm
(hobo shakes can with change and interrupts couple in heated makeout session)
Bitchy girlfriend, shrieking: Seriously? Seriously? Are you seriously asking me now? We're in the middle of making out. Seriously?
–Ave B & 7th St
Overheard by: friend of the mole people
Guido to another: When you're makin' out, the next thing you know, you could be bangin'.
–Staten Island
Girl to guy friend: Once you get married, we are never going to be able to make out anymore.
–Houston & Mulberry
Man to friend: It's like that time I saw two women on walkers making out. I love New York!
–45th & 10th
Overheard by: Drunk
